The Man in the Smoke Screen
For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts…So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view…We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making His appeal through us.~ Isa 55:8-9, 2 Cor 5:16, 20 NIV
In this post I’m sharing a true “short story” with details that are important to show how God works in ways we don’t expect. Sometimes it’s easy to have a “hmmm should I write this?” moment as it can be a little uncomfortable to reveal to others what sometimes goes on inside of our heads as we don’t want to be judged. It’s hard enough sometimes to be “real” with ourselves, let alone others–and we end up judging ourselves harder than others do. But I believe in letting my humanity walk on water with the risk of sinking–being authentic and vulnerable so that we can all be “real” with one another and be “real” for God.
I’d also love for you to comment and share your thoughts on God speaking and working through your life to bless others! If you have any experiences that fit with these where it was truly “indeed God in deed”, please share with us so that we all can be encouraged and praise His wonderful works. Pass this on to others to be a blessing or so that they too can add to our “God inDeed” testimony chain!
One of my sons was off of school one day and I decided to take him to IHOP since he loves pancakes and we had not been there in a while (well, not to sit down and eat anyway–we do a lot of take out dining when I don’t cook–as it is often a challenge to dine in restaurants at their ages–and it gives my husband a chance to taste ‘real’ cooking…and me too! Culinary arts–or even experiments–just not my gift!) As we approached the entry, I saw that there was a wait, which our stomachs were not happy about since we had both not had much breakfast.
I assume most IHOPs may be structured this same way. The restaurant had a set of glass double doors, then a little waiting area with a bench against the wall to either side, then another set of double doors that led into the bigger waiting room inside of the restaurant. When we walked into the first set of double doors in this non-smoking establishment, I noticed a man bending over on a bench in the corner on one of the benches as if trying to hide the fact that he was smoking.
The moment my nose entered the small area, the smoke rushed up my nose when I breathed in, as I had not expected to have to hold my breath as I usually prepare myself to do as I walk by so that I don’t inhale the smoke. I, like my mother and her mother alike, have sinuses that react strongly to inhalation of cigarette smoke within the first half a sniff. I get a sinus headache almost immediately and have to take a decongestant to relieve it. I have friends and relatives who smoke and they just know that when they have to light up, I step back about 15 feet for a while!
Needless to say, I was a little frustrated that our table for two–mother and son–was about to become a table for three–a headache joining us! My son and I went inside, put our name on the list and sat down far across the waiting room at a little wall dividing the waiting area from the kitchen so that we were as far away from the entry area with the smoke as possible–since each time the door was opened the invisible smoke screen came into the restaurant and I could sense it going into my sinuses. I could tell that the servers and hostess who were in the area were a little disturbed knowing that he was not supposed to be smoking, but they were all pretty young and I assume probably not wanting to risk a conflict with the gentleman.
Then the man came into the restaurant. Judging–so easy to do though we should not–just from his outward appearance, I could see how he was a little intimidating to think about approaching. His face was kind of scraggly–like typically shaved but growing back and left unshaven; he wore worn baggy green sweat pants a little high revealing lengthy socks and a red sweat jacket that was closed up to the top of his heck; he shuffled around back and forth from inside the restaurant to his self-designated smoking area several times as if having a need to smoke every few minutes out of anxiousness or something.
And each time he walked near me, the breeze from his movement blew the scent of smoke up my nose as it did not have time to wear off as he went in and out. Sometimes the hood on his jacket was up, sometimes down. His facial expressions seemed distraught, certainly not happy and he avoided eye contact with anyone.
But he did not seem approachable. His demeanor and presence gave you the feel that at any time he might go into some sort of a rage that would cause us to dive for the floors. I actually considered leaving as I just didn’t have a good feeling about this situation. But I fought my better or not better judgment and stayed to please my son, who though his tummy was growling was so very excited about the thought of pancakes with strawberries and whipped cream on top.
I noticed that the man was returning to a seat on the north side of the restaurant and I prayed that God would sit us on the south side separated from the other by the waiting area and kitchen so that I was far from the smoke and my concern for safety. Many stared at him as he passed back and forth, intimidated and critical looks on their faces. I was intentionally adjusting my thoughts not to judge, but just kept hoping that he would hold it together if something really was going on with him and scanned the area thinking of an exit or hiding strategy just in case.
Eventually we were taken to our booth and I was relieved that it was on the south side! I ignored my headache and we happily ordered our food. And when our drinks were delivered, we had a fourth unexpected guest! A server was bringing the glass, drink pitcher and silverware of the mysterious “man behind the smoke screen” from his table across the restaurant and sitting him in the booth right behind ours. And he was facing the back of my son’s head, who was seated across from me in our booth, and facing directly towards my face. I looked down or at my son to avoid eye contact as I didn’t want him to think that I was staring at him or anything, but it was hard not to lock eyes every so often because of how we were sitting.
At this point, my mind is complaining a little, as I see that he is getting up and down every few minutes as he was before–to his table, to the entryway, again and again. But at least with a longer walk now, the lingering smoke was no longer with him long enough to affect me. He wasn’t eating at this point, though I don’t know if he had already or was going to. He had a pitcher of juice, his wallet, his keys and a small notebook at the table with him.
As I ate with my son, I could feel the Holy Spirit start to well up inside of me. As I do at times when someone’s feeling of burden is laid upon my heart and spirit, I felt a pit feeling deep in my stomach, my palms became damp, and my eyes felt as if they wanted to tear up. Suddenly I felt compelled to pray for this man and my eating came to a stop (and believe me, when I have pancakes or french toast topped with warm apples and whipped cream, stopping is not an optino!). I stopped chatting with my son, and just prayed and felt a deep, spiritual compassion for this man.
And then it was impressed upon my mind to be Jesus to this man, to show him God somehow. I dialogued in my head with the Lord, asking what I was supposed to do as I was scared to speak to him. The Lord didn’t seem to care if I spoke to him or not, but only wanted me to have the name “God” go out to him somehow. My God-given care and responsibility outweighed any fears I had and I knew I would obey.
The man then left again, leaving all of his things on the table, and this time went outside of the window behind his table and smoked outside in the cold weather (cold for my area in the South is really just light jacket weather). He turned in towards the glass, just about staring right at me at times, maybe watching as his wallet was within view. I rummaged through my wallet looking for something, thinking I would give him a note with whatever the Lord wanted me to say. I had my son hurry up and finish eating, hoping to be able to do it before he came back in from smoking, but it didn’t work out. I saw him coming back in. When his server came to his table the next time, I was sure to look at her name tag in case I needed to speak to her.
All I could find in my purse that I could write on was a Marble Slab Creamery punch card that was actually full and I was waiting to use for a waffle cone of double dark chocolate mixed with pecans! I wrote across the bottom of it something like, “May God bless you in this new year.” I felt it was adequate; it had the word “God” in it as I felt I was supposed to say. Maybe it was a sign that was being sent to him. It didn’t matter. I just wanted to obey.
I also decided that I would give him a gift card, like $10. So when my server came to our table, I asked him if I could buy one and he said to get it at the check out up front. So when we left, I asked for one and they said they were out. Now how should I get him the note and get God’s point across? I wanted to have the server give it to him with the card.
Well, I decided that I would ask to pay his check. So I asked for his server–good thing I had looked at her name. When I described who I wanted to pay the check for, she looked at me with strange surprise. But she tallied it up and let me pay it and then she asked me if I wanted to tell him anything. I handed her the Marble Slab card and asked her to give it to him and just say that one of the customers paid his check. Then my son and I jetted out of there quickly as I didn’t want him to know who did it, but just to hopefully feel the light of the anonymous, pleasant surprise in his seemingly dark moment.
As we drove off, my son asked why I paid for the man’s ticket if I was so bothered by his smoking near me. (He knew that I was irritated by it as I mentioned to him that it was bothering me and I think he heard me say under my breath, “oh great” when the gentleman was moved next to us.) It was a wonderful opportunity to show him how God’s love and God’s will far outweighs our own human biases, desires and sometimes false wisdom–how His thoughts are not like our thoughts and His ways are higher than our ways.
No one can tell me that it was not a work of God to move that man, the last man I wanted to be near–and requested in prayer not to–all the way across the restaurant to sit right next to me, being face to face making eye contact with me, and then to supernaturally put it on my heart to reach out to him in both a natural and spiritual way–it was way beyond mere human response of typical “aw, poor person, I hope he is okay”.
But all along I was the one really in a smoke screen. I had not only been affected by a natural smoke screen from the cigarette, but also was in a spiritual smoke screen created by my own fears, discomforts and cultural programming. But God let me not only see through the dense fog of my humanity, but reach through it and touch another life. I have no idea what that man was going through or why I was supposed to do what I did, but if God was the author of it all, it has to be working for his good–it certainly worked for mine and my son’s.
I share this with you today to remind us all to be alert of our own smoke screens that we create, that our society creates, that may be blinding us to the needs of others–to our roles in the lives of others–especially those who we are least likely to want to reach out to. Because we are first spiritual beings before natural, fleshly beings, we must intentionally keep ourselves open to the leading of the Lord through His Spirit so that we can be Jesus to others.
But as humans, aren’t we always having to find our way through our smoke screens? Some of us don’t even realize when we are in them–we can’t see beyond the 5 feet or 5 minutes ahead of us; we don’t believe that we are in one–we don’t believe those who are outside of our smoke screen calling out to us, trying to shine a light for us to find our way out so that we can step out of it and experience real life through Jesus Christ. What smoke screens do you tend to be blinded by?
I felt that the lyrics to the song “God Speaking” by Mandisa are quite fitting–and when I heard it on the radio for the first time, it had the ‘ways are higher’ words in it and I just knew it was for this post:
Have you ever heard a love song
that sets your spirit free?
Have you ever watched a sunrise
and felt you could not breathe?
What if it’s Him?
What if it’s God speaking?
Have you ever cried a tear
that you could not explain?
Have you ever met a stranger
who already knew your name?
What if it’s Him?
What if it’s God speaking?
Who knows how He’ll get ahold of us?
Get our attention to prove He is enough.
He’ll do, and He’ll use whatever He wants to.
To tell us, I Love You.
Have you ever lost a loved one
Who you thought should still be here?
Do you know what it feels like
to be tangled up in fear?
What if He’s somehow involved?
What if He’s speaking through it all?
Who knows how He’ll get ahold of us?
Get our attention to prove He is enough.
He’ll do and He’ll use whatever He wants to
To tell us, I love you.
His ways are higher;
His ways are better,
Though sometimes strange.
What could be stranger than God in a manger?
Who knows how He’ll get ahold of us?
Get our attention to prove He is enough.
Who knows how He’ll get ahold of you?
Get your attention to prove He is enough.
He’ll do and He’ll use whatever He wants to,
To tell us I love you.
God is speaking, I love you
Christian Life Coaching Call to Action:
1. Is there someone in your life that you feel like you’d rather not be in close contact with, but either you can’t avoid it or they often seem to somehow end up interacting with you? Seek God to see if there is some reason for this person being in your life and if so, how does He want you to reach out to him or her? What are your human thoughts vs. God’s thoughts?
2. Is there something that God has been prompting you to do for someone that you have avoided doing because your flesh does not feel like you should do it–maybe you feel they don’t deserve it or that it would put you out of your comfort zone or inconvenience you? Ask God to strengthen you to be obedient despite how you feel and to see them through spiritual eyes instead of worldly ones. What ways of His can you adopt that are higher than your ways?
3. Do you know how God speaks to you? through you? Is there a certain feeling you get? is it at a certain time like when nothing is on your mind in the middle of the night — is there enough down time in your life in which you can try to listen and feel God’s presence? If you do, ask Him to use you so that you can be “God speaking” to others. If you don’t, be more intentional to spend time alone with Him–yes in Bible study, devotion or praise or prayer–but not only when your mind is active and you hear yourself speaking, but also just in intentional times of silence, just sitting with Him as if sitting with a significant other, holding hands in silence, staring at the sunset, just knowing that your hearts are beating together—-just to hear “God speaking”.
4. Be more intentional–in those moments when you are most unlikely to feel like you want to serve anyone, to touch anyone’s life–to listen and feel for God speaking? He may have a special task for you, but you are so carried away in the whirlwind of your own thoughts and concerns that you don’t hear Him and are missing opportunities to change the lives of others–to change your life.
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Arris:
Wonderful post here.I completely understand the smoke allergy for I have it as well.Thank you for sharing this story.I think we’ve all had those moments where God tells us to do something totally unexpected and maybe even out of character for us…Blessings~Sharon
Comment by Sharon Goemaere — February 11, 2008 @ 7:17 am
Yes and isn’t it wonderful that when we are “out of character” it can often put us “into His character”!
Arris
Comment by Arris — February 11, 2008 @ 11:10 am
Thank you for this reminder to listen for God to speak.
Comment by Lillie Ammann — February 13, 2008 @ 11:22 pm
interesting post. glad I stopped by.
Comment by ladysown — February 14, 2008 @ 11:47 am